Fix Me

Most nights are tough.

I lay there in darkness

overwhelmed by things I wish I didn't

think about.

This loneliness is eating at me. 

No one needs me, and I don't need anyone

-that's okay.

It's the haunting thought that

no one desires to have me.

No one requests to see me, more or less,

invite me anywhere.

My wellbeing isn't a second thought, for

no one is encouraged to check in on me.

I am always eerily alone, and 

I always have been.

Bubble baths and smooth sheets

hardly make up the absence

of love and comforting hugs.

The loud, thumping beat of my music

doesn't compare to the

missing words of affection that

I crave to hear. 

My reality is dull and flat.

It's a storm in the way negative thoughts

crack like thunder.

And endless sorrow falls like rain.

My motivation gets sucked away by

the continuous cold wind.

Grey clouds of depression cloak around me, keeping

my blue sky from peaking through. 

Grey, and sad, and gloomy-

is the sky I have become. 

The sad songs, aren't sad enough.

I've learned to fall asleep to 

the echo of my heart breaking, but

the demons of my mind still linger.

But in the middle of my chaos

there was you.

Maybe you can fix me.

Like you say, I can fix you.